Sunday, February 1, 2015

hooked on a feeling

Guys, I really want to read. I want to write. I want to draw and sketch and paint with watercolors. And then I want to go play in the woods and get my feet and hands dirty. I want summer. I want to run barefoot, suntanned, sweaty- and not care. I want the beach. I want salt water and wind from the coast and sand covering my legs, driving on the golf cart to the ocean. I want to feel the cooling relief of that gel stuff on my burning shoulders. I want relief from school. I want the summer to come [my last summer without a job hopefully] but I don't want it to go away either. Also, I want to chop my hair off.

Basically I'm discontent and already done with winter. I've made it to second semester anyway. And my books are looking so heartbreaking-ly beautiful, sitting gathering dust on my shelves. So neglected it hurts.

We're getting into ancient Greece and stuff in history and literature. So, that's pretty cool. I've also started trying to alternate running and working out every other day [emphasis on *trying*]. It's been going for a week now and I've already missed a couple of the workout days...... yeah. I love the feeling of waking up and going for a morning run and then taking a shower and getting my day started. Also- yoga. How. Do I Yoga. 

Back to what I was talking about up there^^. I really want to enjoy and treasure this time in my life though. Because it really is a good time. I don't have a job yet. I don't have that many responsibilities, really. I'm really [how many times have I used the word "really" in the last paragraph? really?] wanting to tighten up my school schedule, so I can work really hard at it and then just be done with it for a couple hours at night or something. Maybe get outside with the kids/cousins, write, organize, whatever! And then I really want to set a bedtime of 10:30 then read until 11 and sleep. Like, that would just be great. I waste a lot of time. All the little things build up and I don't want that. 

Oh, yeah. Also I'm obsessed with the Guardians of the Galaxy soundtrack. It kind of refuses to get out of my mind... ever these days. [okay as in the last 24 hours. but it seems way longer].

Speaking of using my time well, this is probably not the best use of my time right now- as in, this is a bad use of my time right now. I'm working on my testimony and a biology test and a literary analysis and I just get overwhelmed way too easily. Maybe I need this time to rant to no one sometimes though. 

Well, this post has been all over the place. But that's okay. Cause lately I'm all over the place. And, yeah, that's okay too.

....... right?


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