Grief dances

Grief dances her way

Through the streets of the slum

While the women whisper— no shame 

Lingers obtrusively

In the corner of your eye 

At every family gathering 

Sprinkles distaste on all your old favorites

Grief hounds you at home

Begs you to leave

Wishes you would stay

Never satisfied, like a mother, with your choice

Grief returns 

Like the cowboy in a western

Come to duel for the soul 

Of a dusty decrepit town 

She returns 

Like the shivering autumn leaves

To the dirt

Like your unrelated aunt 

Who shows up to visit unannounced 

Grief crashes

To the floor like a pot 

In the kitchen cabinet 

In the middle of the night 

She is a sudden summer thunderstorm 

Grief returns 

Like the hair tie you lost

Like the water bottle you forgot about

And don’t want to wash

Like the cilantro you left in the fridge

She returns 

Like the golden retriever

At the end of Homeward Bound

Stubborn, relentless

            Kissing your wet, 

                            messy face

— olivia gwyn 

 

Lately I am tender

Lately everything

matters and hurts too much

and I feel young and tender

and jerk back from feeling

before it takes over

Lately I try to breathe 

against the hurt of the world

people are dying, wanting,

fighting, losing, losing,

and I know them all

Lately I count money

to a soundtrack of an empty room

an empty seat at someone's table

and this is all too ugly for a poem

and I hate it and I hate it

and I want it to be gone

Lately I am tender 

but some people can't afford to be

Lately I am tender

and look for gentleness in your face

and I can't always see

but your face too is tender

and it weeps for all these things

— olivia gwyn 

Let me hold you a little while longer

 

Let me hold you a little while longer

I roll over in the middle of the night / to go pee for the third time / while our leader sleeps soundly through the night / I stumble reaching to turn the florescent light on / and worry about what kind of world / I’m bringing you into / while the most powerful man in the country / shines his fluorescent white teeth / in the name of exclusivity / The sun goes to bed early and comes up late / and my dreams are dark and / drag at my limbs to stay in bed / You kick me from the inside / and I know you are almost ready to face / the cruel world, the fluorescent, angry lights / I dream for you in the dark / gentle sunlight on your face / young grass clutched eagerly in your firm fists / toes dipped in cool clear water / and shrieks of delight from your sun dappled cheeks / One more night I whisper / and try not to cry and instead / try to think of every good thing that could ever be / and not about how I’ll never again / have you here so close to me / the illusion of safety / Let me hold you a little while longer / Let me dream for you and build / with my own two hands against the rising tide / a world more kind than home.

— olivia gwyn