look at me

and I will put my hope again
in things that have proven to fail me
and He'll remind me again
torn hands gentle on my face
look at Me


let us fix our eyes on Jesus, the author and perfecter of our faith, who for the joy set before Him endured the cross, scorning its shame, and sat down at the right hand of the throne of God. hebrews 12:2.

for now we see in a mirror dimly, but then face to face. now I know in part; then I shall know fully, even as I have been fully known. 1 corinthians 13:12.

to say i love you

you say I love you
without even knowing what it means
on the drive home from your high school dance
and wonder where she came from

you say I love you
knees weak at the altar
and breathe a deep sigh of relief
driving away from the noise hand in hand

you say I love you
without making a sound
crawling into bed another late night on the job
careful not to wake her up

you say I love you
as the wrinkles come
while picking up wandering babies left and right
and setting 17 year olds back on their feet

you say I love you
as the sunsets brighten and fade in the sky
as the moon grows and shrinks once again
and you wonder how many she has left

you say I love you
when she can't remember your face
and you show her the pictures
and tell her their names, four times since 1 o'clock

you say I love you
as they roll her down the aisle past crumpled teary faces
to a place in the ground out of which she loved to bring life
next to a plot awaiting your leisure

you say I love you
to the empty pillow beside your own at night
and wonder how it could go by in the blink of an eye
and why it had to be her first and wish you had just one more chance

to say I love you
in a thousand different ways

scared of

And
I don't know

I'm just scared to look in your eyes
Cause you're looking at me like I mean something
Like maybe I mean everything
And the pen in my hand is shaking
Cause I love those eyes
And I'm scared of them
Cause they're not afraid of love
They're not afraid to hurt for love

And
I don't know

Why I'm so scared
I'm scared to have lest I lose
I'm scared to jump lest I fall
I'm scared to hold you close lest you slip through my fingers

Gone

But mostly I'm scared that I'll leave you bruised
Cause I love those eyes
And I can't see them wounded

But
I don't know

Cause every time I look away and look back
Your eyes are still looking into mine
Like they'd be content to do the same forever
And I feel myself smiling in spite of myself
Cause I see the smile on the edge of your lips

And it's hard to be scared when you're right there
Unshaven and laughing and so familiar

And it's hard to imagine you gone
Cause you've always stayed